e-HUG mag

Why are 42% of Black Successful Women Not Married?

            I came across this video on NecoleBitchie.com.  I found it pretty intriguing but maybe a little misleading.  The best line to me was: "Are their standards too high or are the pickings too slim?"  I think it's both.  1st, lets talk about the slim pickings. They said there are 1.8 million more black females than black males and then went on to break down that only 54% of those men are available.  But did you hear where they were reporting from? ATLANTA,GA!!! The mecca for Black GAY men! Of course they cant find anyone down there. They need to move immediately if their clocks are ticking.  I know Real Housewives of Atlanta made it seem so glamorous but ask Sheree how hard it is to find a good, heterosexual Black man in Atlanta.

        Now besides that, are Black women's standards too high? I love how Necole put it: "...it’s not that their standards are too high, it just may be that their standards are too high for the pool of men that are available to them." Very true but there are two sides to this.  Is it absolutely absurd to want a tall handsome man with no kids making 6 figures or better? No! That's a great goal though that's not the standard Black man AT ALL! So that's where Miss Bitchie is right. But the problem with our "standards" nowadays is that its all about "THE LOOK"  How will my friends like him? Will my mother/father accept him?  He's too tall, he's too short, he's light skin, he's dark skin...  These are all excuses that block you from true happiness.  A loving marriage is not dependent on how tall or short, light or dark, or even rich or poor he is (believe it or not).  It's the love, respect and loyalty you have for each other that will really make the marriage work.  So when these young ladies are looking for a mate, they need to be 1st colorblind because Black Men are NOT the only ones out there and definitely throw the "requirements" away because you may be turning away your soul-mate.

(Source: Necolebitchie.com)

~ Empress

Blackberries:The Death of QT

Here's the defining moment of the movie Seven Pounds...

        For those unfamiliar with the movie, after getting into this car accident and killing 7 people including his beautiful fiancé,Tim Thomas (played by Will Smith) felt like he had nothing to live for. So he dedicated the rest of his life to giving back to 7 people not wanting anything in return. His beach house, lung lobe, part of his liver, a kidney, bone marrow, eyes and the most memorable his heart.  Very touching and heartfelt. But why did it take losing his fiancé for him to put down the BB and realize there are more important things in life.

        This is a very extreme example but proves my point none the less. Blackberries are the DEATH of QT. Blackberries, iPhones, palm treos and any other high tech phones on the market. You can talk, text, email, IM, tweet and surf the web all at once. Who has time for human contact? :-/

        There's nothing more rude and annoying than the click-clacking of tiny keys while you're trying to spend time with your significant other. At dinner, BBs are now part of the place setting - right next to knife, right?. What has this world come to? What on earth can't wait an hour or two? What were you doing a few years ago before such technology was available?  Not only is it annoying but your attention is definitely not focused on your date or company. How great of a time can you possibly have with the person in front of you, if you're having a deeper conversation with someone else or several others?

        These phones have single-handedly ruined quality time. But you don't have to fall victim. Are you annoyed as I am about excessive phone use when you're trying to bond? - try to set some rules. RULE NUMBER 1 - NO PHONES AT THE DINNER TABLE! That's my only rule but u can make your own depending on how annoying your situation is. Lol. No phones on dates, period. No phones in bed. Whatever allows you more time w/ your honey.

         We need to detach ourselves from technology sometimes and really connect with that special someone in your life.  So before you lose the love of your life, stop ignoring and neglecting them to play on your phone. You may just give him/her more time to make some new "friends". Probably those that know how to put the down the damn phone for a second and actually enjoy their company.

~ Empress

The Nikki DaVinci Code

   

         It is not raining, but lets pretend to set a mood.  Lets imagine rain kissing the pane of the window with cold lips, no secrets between the two.  Love is the invisible feeling that permeates each moment between breaths.  Are you living, or just surviving? Can you envision how many eyelashes decked your last lovers eyes?  When was the last time you found yourself short of breath standing still from crossing paths with a stranger?  The smallest things in life often come with the deepest impacts.  Am I getting too deep?  I will gladly continue further but introductions might be in order.  I am Nikki DaVinci and I am here to engage you in all types of mental play.  Survival of the fittest is my motto, so you will have to be grown to play in my room. I will leave nothing untouched if you have requests, curiosity or just plain knowledge, do share.  You can reach me at NikkiDaVinci@gmail.com to voice questions you'd like addressed, or topics discussed.  
        In my articles, The Nikki DaVinci Code, I will approach all topics like I approach love and sex, completely open minded.  I want to share verbal confections with you, satiate your sweet tooth, sneak you mental midnight snacks.  There are so many things we can discuss, because everything that tastes good is not good for you.  In the same instance, there are so many delectable flavors that new ones constantly appear for the swallowing.  Beyond those two extremes, there are some things that only taste good at first and leave you with the bitter taste.  Sugar cane resembles many loves.  With all that said, I am excited to begin this journey with you, and will be accepting emails immediately both signed or anonymous.  So feel free to tell me what you are craving, I will have something for everyone.  So tell me, what do you have a taste for?

~Nikki DaVinci

What do YOU think?

Good Day Ehuggers!

I believe that we have already established that I'm a twitterhead, which is a term used for twitter addicts like myself. Well while cruising my time line, I came across a few tweets in regards to love and relationships. I will like to share them with you and tell me if you agree, disagree or what feeling came over you after you read them. Maybe confusion...disgust...enlightenment what ever it is let me know. Here you go:

 

"Real Men know know what love is, we just fight it because woman recover from a broken heart easier."  

"A lot of men go through women because they're scared to be alone."   

"Women easily or often mix up lust for love. #1 reason why they're easily heart broken."  

"Woman will get a man and try to change him...forever...men will go through women until they find the right one if ever."  

"Men looking for a sexy version of their mommas."  

"If a man hurts you, you have many avenues to repair your heart....girlfriends...sisters..momma's. What do men have? His doggy azz homeboy? That home girl that really wants to be with him in the 1st place?....we don't have that support system that's why we stray."   

"It's so hard to love and trust when so many have motives."  

 

I don't know if I agree with all of them but I must admit it has opened my eyes to the male point of view. Men tend not to speak on their feelings in their relationships but find it a bit easier to do on twitter.....whatever! Let me know what you think? 

 

 

Speak On It,

Ms. V

Wife...Woman...Friend

Ms. Dana Gilmore is a spoken word artist that has penned one of my all time favorite pieces: Wife…Woman…Friend.  This poem has hit home for me and has touched a lot of the women I know.  Actually, I currently have a friend that is waking up to the realization that there is nothing wrong with her.  She's learning that there might not even be anything wrong with the man she loves.  Unfortunately, while she plays the part of his wife, he only sees her as his friend. 

So this week, I want to dedicate Dana Gilmore's poem to my friend and all of the other women out there that are coming to terms with their relationships.  Also, when you get the chance check out Dana's website, www.danagilmore.com to see other poems by her and learn about her upcoming events and merchandise for sale.

 Wife...Woman...Friend Part I


I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that my beginning was his end
After all, we were just friends.
Although, in my world I was his girl 
So, I would pretend to be his wife and saying silly things like...
”It’s only so many years in a woman’s life,” 
Right, so I gave him three 
Yet, he had the audacity to step to me on this Donnell Jones, “I don’t know where I wanna be type shit.”
It wasn’t supposed to be like this 
He hit me with the forehead kiss
Told me life was a journey and he was ready to explore this shit
And I was pissed
To me he was a hypocrite like a fake preacher in the pulpit and he left me sick
I start pullin’ out Tupac hits tellin’ me to keep my head up and
R. Kelly picks about when a woman gets fed up
‘C ause I was down with him for so long that I didn’t think I could get up
‘Til one day I got tired of sleeping on pillows that my tears had wet up and realized that life goes on And no, he didn’t choose me but that doesn’t make him right nor wrong
And just because he was the epitome of my life, doesn’t make me wrong nor right 
Like I said, I was his friend not his wife
And I should have acted within that capacity and
Maybe then this break-up would’ve been “just one of those things” instead of a fuckin’ tragedy
And all the time I spent mad at him– I should’ve been mad at me
After all, I was the one that gave him the key to my house and
Let him hang clothes in my closet just in case we go out
Not to mention washing all his dirty clothes just “to make a full load,” and
Letting him finish off all the leftovers, just “so the food don’t go old” 
For the times that we raw dogged ‘cause he “lost all the rubbers” 
And though I showed him more support than his own father, brother, sister, and mother
And just ‘cause those same people dialed my number when they’re trying to get in touch 
And he received mail at my address “just cause he sleeps here so much” 
Got total control of the remote control to the TV, DVD, and radio 
And even though his name is not on my lease, he has shit in my house that’s off limits to me
Like his “side of my bed” and his “stash of weed” 
And I better not touch his shoe box, Fruitloops, mouthwash, or toothbrush
He even had his own set of towels 
But, none of this obligates him to me ‘cause not once did we exchange vows 
And if I knew then what I know now, I probably would’ve listened
When he said it was some “shit” he had to get out of his system 
But, I was too busy bitchin’, jumpin’ bad like I was gonna hit him
Because in the back of my mind all I could fathom was how much I was going to miss him
So, just because I’m crying doesn’t mean that I’m the victim 
It just means I was scared to let him go ‘cause some other chick might get him
And that was my fault because it was my decision  
I should’ve never put my heart in my mind’s position 
And regardless to where we went wrong...I was all the way gone 
Doing stupid shit like checking pants pockets and returning missed calls on his phone
Like I was Inspector Gadget 
But, I couldn’t shake him– he was like a bad habit
And all this for a n***a that was just average and doing average shit
Like talking out the side of his neck and thinking with his dick
But, I must admit, he was the one I wanted to commit so
Either I wasn’t living up to my potential or I was just the average chick
But I chose to believe I was a woman caught up in a feeling
Both physical and emotional and was way to willing to give her all to a man 
And though it may sound stupid, I would do it all again 
Just next time for my husband and not that n***a I call my friend

~ Urban Diva

Battle of the Sexes: Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties

 

In the Male Corner: Lenny

We all want to get married, don’t we? We want that special man or woman to spend the rest of our lives with?  Well, let’s just say you actually find this person.  You make it through all the ups and downs that sink most other relationships.  You get the courage up and propose, and the other party accepts.  You’re happy as all hell.  You can finally do this “Happily Ever After” thing that you’ve been waiting your entire life for.  You start planning the wedding and you’re almost to the finish line, but you have one giant hurdle to leap that can possibly destroy everything that you have worked for up until this point.  THE BACHELOR/BACHELORETTE PARTY.

So what do you do?? Ladies, do you want your man to have a night with his raunchy and rowdy friends right before you get married? The short answer is HELL YEAH.  Understand this, you can either know about it or you can beef and his friends will just do it anyway. And will probably make it crazier than you can ever imagine just to spite you for stealing their buddy away.  Close your damn mouth and support this night of ignorance because he’s not going to bring this foolishness into the marriage unless you beef about it and allow him to.  Are you worried that he’s going to bone one of these strippers?? NEWS FLASH, if he’ll bone a stripper the week of his wedding, then he’s probably been smashing something on the side anyway.  This isn’t a reason to go and not trust your dude.  If you’ve trusted him, then continue to do so.  Trust that all he wants is you and he won’t do anything to jeopardize the sanctity of the relationship that you have built together. 

Why do we need this night?? Well lets be all the way real here: Things change after marriage.  They’re not supposed to, but they do.  We can’t tell you that we’re going out on the town with the fellas and don’t wait up for me anymore.  That’s all the way out the window.  You want to know where we’re going, with whom and when we’re coming back.  Give him that one night of carefree ignorance that he will have to bag up and put in storage forever. Go out and have an amazing night with your friends and see him at the altar with a fresh new beginning.  Now fellas, don’t go telling your lady what to do at her bachelorette party either. Don’t fall victim to the insecure man syndrome that’s been spreading faster the H1N1.  Don’t do it for the same exact reasons you don’t want her to do it to you. 

In the Female Corner: Empress

I believe Bachelor and Bachelorette Party (or the more refined version: The Bridal Shower) is simply to celebrate the fact that you've finally found that special someone with your friends. Some would say that's what the wedding and reception is about but for those that have gone through it, you know the wedding is just a show you put on for your friends and family. "LOOK AT US! We’re happy and married!" And all that good shit. But the day or week before is the real celebration: "YES! GOT 'EM!"
        

The more refined Bridal Shower consists of games and gifts to prepare the bride to be for what lies ahead. Very classy, maybe some wine and a couple risqué games. The traditional Bachelor/Bachelorette parties are usually wild celebrations at a night club, strip or hotel suite at which the groom/bride-to-be get a couple lap dances and TOOOOOTALLY wasted. This is all cool with me. There's nothing wrong with a lap dance before or after marriage - as long as you don't take to the next level.

        But here's what I don't understand. Why do men see it as a night to "get IT out of their system"? What exactly is "IT" and what the hell is going down on this magical night that "IT" disappears the next day. Whatever "IT" is: wandering eye, desire to be with other females, scared of commitment; IT’S still going be there the minute after the bachelor party is over. So having sex with random women the night before your nuptials isn't going to make the marriage any better.

Vent Alert: N.A.S. but are we to blame?

For those of you who don't personally know me I have a confession to make. I'm addicted to twitter. While cruising through the twitter world I can’t help to take part in heated debates between men and women. Most of the time its trash talk about the opposite sex but every now and then there are good points made and worth discussing. The other day a young man brought up a valid point in an interesting way. SO interesting, that I’ve decided to share with my ehug family. I dedicate this article to @i_am_extra.

        "Is it safe to say that women are to blame to blame for 'ain't shit' men" was his initial statement. Now me being the feminist that I am, I wasted no time to jump at his throat. "No!" was my response. I was too hot to elaborate I couldn’t believe my eyes.  All I could think was how dare he blame us, they’re the reason were now how we are. Woman now have put up security walls, don't believe in love or just go for what they can get out of a man instead of what they really want. Caring and loving these "ain't shit" men has got us nothing but stress, tears, and cold hearts. I just couldn't understand where he was coming from with that comment. Believe it or not he agrees with us. He knows that women are now scorned and cold because of this type of man and wants us to put a stop to it. He continued to say he's tired of hearing his women complain and being let down. He actually wants us happy and to raise our standards. I didn't get that from his initial statement, silly me.

          As I cruised along there were females that agreed with him and I just couldn't understand, but then again I was reading as woman scorned. I did agree with one young lady to a certain extent. She stated: yes it is our fault because we birth you '"ain't shit" men. I thought that was too funny as I love a play on words. In that sense we could be to blame because we birth and raise the men, but not all mothers were raised properly to raise their sons properly. So then who's to blame?

Other valid points were made by the end of the discussion and I was sold. We are to blame for this type of man. One female said we'll know our friend’s boyfriend "ain't shit" but bother saying a word about him because we know shell flip out and isn’t going to leave him. I thought about it and she had a point there. One said proudly, I love my black men no matter what they put me through. I thought about it and she didn't have a point there. Women who think like her is exactly what the tweeter was referring to. If "he" knows he can drag you through the mud and still have your love then why should he bother carrying you over the mud for the same love. He knows you love his "ain't shit" self and will continue to not be shit cause that's where you have placed the bar for him. Without even noticing it, you are promoting him to stay the same. If you don't make demands to be handled with respect and courtesy AND walk away till they are met then he has no reason change. Debating and arguing is just a past time to him. He knows you'll eventually shut up and things will go back to the norm. They have learned to let you go on and on till your blue in the face cause to him it all sounds like blah blah blah. Especially if he knows what it takes to put you at ease again.  Whether is buying gifts, sex, or just giving enough space to miss him.

Raise the bar, have pride, gain dignity, and love yourself. When a man is faced with this he will have to step to you accordingly or show you that he just can’t measure up. One of the deepest quotes I’ve read in a while was written by this tweeter to help his argument. It read "when we lessen the value of our women we lessen the value of our people.” I know many of you are questioning who am I to tell you what to do in your relationships and what makes me think I'm right. I get my relationship views from my mother, a strong minded woman, who told me if you are not his sun, moon and stars then let it go. I’ve carried this with me through life and have no problem cutting a partner off if I'm not just that. And it has been working. They either come back ready to step their game up or keep it moving because they can’t measure up. If you have ever seen my favorite movie 300, Leiunitis explains how the women of Sparta are equals and respected because they birth and raise the great men of Sparta. Now, if we can only think like that in our generation in America. But, I guess it’s the nurturer in us that brings us to say "I love him....hell change...we'll work on it". Guess what? I got a quote for that as well!  "Love makes you see what that person could be, Understanding lets you see the person that they are". With that said I say love with an understanding.  

                  One last thing... What’s funny to me is many of you ladies who are settling and aren't raising your standards are reading this feeling stupid because you get it but not enough to walk away from your situation. You know you aren't his sun moon and stars yet and that's OK with you. So what I wanna know is what is it that keeps you with that "ain't shit" man? Why do you stick around and not encourage him to step up? Is it your age? Is it fear of being lonely? Do you think no one else will do what he does if not more? Do you think you’re not capable of starting a new relationship? Do you not think you deserve the best and some? Is it self esteem? What? What is it ladies that makes us settle? I need to know.

 

Love,

Ms. V

The Power of the P...

        Monday I attended a female showcase called "The Power Of The P...". Ladies of all colors and creeds came to showcase there talent in the name of femininity. Some spit lyrics, others sang "their song" and others spoke that good 'ol spoken word. After listening to act after act it was obvious that the overall message was that females are empowered and strong enough to make through just about any obstacle, including relationships, jobs, love, abuse, the recession and then some. Now we at Ehug know the struggles of a female, yet we also know the strength a female embodies to overcome it all and then some. While at Karma Lounge surrounded by all these well-rounded, fashion forward, enthusiastic ladies I couldn't help but be proud to be a woman. And not just any woman, a woman with a goal, a life to fulfill and a destiny to discover, just as all who were there. The sense of unity in the room was startling at first because many didn't know each other yet one thing we did all know was that we were all there for the same reason: The Power of the P.

           Simply Kay wrote and performed - Over It, Over You. The title is self explanatory. Her performance was live yet sentimental at the same time. You could tell that whoever she was referring to was no longer on her roster let alone her starting five. He was the past whether he realized it or not. When I asked her what motivated her to write this rap she simply explained "Men feel that when your no longer with them you'll crumble and fall off the face earth. We had what we had and its over....go your way I'll go mine, best of luck to you in life". Now does that not sound like a woman fed up to the point of no return? She's not trying to hear nothing but bye. If not every female, there are many females that can relate to this. At this moment rapping is Simply Kay's creative outlet...just like Ehug Mag is to us. To find out more about her and her movement go to www.bigcity.com.

        Spoken word was delivered by Gia. "This Shit is Crack" is one of those pieces you must hear yourself. Her deliverance of the piece is definitely one of a kind. As I sat there and digested her comparison of love and crack, I realized there were times she was already one step ahead of me. Metaphors and similes left and right. After her performance I was able to pull her to the side for a moment to get a better understanding of "This Shit is Crack".  "Love is an addiction like crack. You move like a fiend...you will do anything for it...leave ur friends, barely see your family, go through withdrawals, cry at night just to get that first high..that feeling you had in the beginning of the relationship." Nuff said Gia, nuff said.

        Nisha - asnani.nisha@gmail.com, sung her original piece : "Love Me Any Way". Nisha explained that it's about being in a relationship that your not really committed to but it's better than being alone. Outside of sex there's no connection. "My heart is out of this but love me anyway...no one else is loving us so let's do this." I cant find anyone to compare her singing style to simply because I haven't heard any like her lately. To make it in this industry,  you must have your own style and sound. She has a sultry, jazzy, blues-like deliverance with her lyrics. With her composer to her side, she beamed confidence as she belted out beautiful notes and scatted where she saw fit. I must say I was astonished by her talent.

        She also performed "T-shirt".  Now this I can relate to. Nisha explained to me that past relationships influenced this number. "Being with someone who thinks they know you so well that can always try to tell you what's best for and think your automatically there's, yet they seem to not understand that you (referring to women) don't have to be in love with him. We can actually just be friends. He doesn't have to be in a relationship with me if my life is such a mess to him, but he is welcome to be in my life. I like the way your t-shirt fits, but that's about it I could do without the rest of you." I get it and I love it. Her voice is out of this world and so is her stage presence. With a demo release in January she will continue to amaze, I'm sure of that! And we're in invited!

        Just when I thought I heard enough and grabbed my coat to head out the door this sultry seductive voice turned me around and sat me back down. Cocoa Sarai worked "Side Effects". She did not sing that song, she worked it. You hear me? She serenaded the whole room with her melodic sounds. Only thing I kept asking myself was "Why is she here? Why isn't she on a billboard somewhere?" The girl can blow something serious and I have no problem giving credit where credit is due. Then she messed my head wit "I Want It All". I swear it could be my theme song. She is a shoe lover like my self and had a man approach her with an "I like your shoes, I can buy you 10 pairs." Her response to that was "That's it? Just ten pairs? Listen, to get closer to this, I want more than just ten pairs of shoes, I want the bags, the diamonds, the shopping spree's. I want it all!" It was a club banger. She had us all on our feet clapping to "I Want It All".

~Ms. V

Relationship Double Standards: Domestic Violence

Check out this video and after you laugh at it with your friends and coworkers – ask yourself – IS THIS OK?

Done laughing? Now let’s be serious. Is this ok just because she’s the female? This car fight reminded me of a very NOT FUNNY domestic abuse case between Rihanna and Chris Brown. Now had this guy lost his cool and decked her one time and she called the cops, that’s all that would've been told.  The almost 10 minutes of her wailing on him would’ve been null and void.  That's not fair to the man that was just humiliated and attacked in front of a crowd of people.

No one REEEALLLY knows what happened in that Lambo. But even Rihanna admitted to KICKING him off so I don’t believe it was a one sided fight at all. But for some reason, when its one sided and its the guy getting beat up – it’s ok! It’s funny. That is one relationship double standard that needs to be straightened out.  Guys always say “My momma always told me to never hit a lady” Well I’m going to tell my daughter “Baby, never hit a man before he BUST YOU UPSIDE YOUR HEAD!” lolol. Crazy.

~ Empress

Battle of the Sexes: Do Men take Summers off in Relationships?

Click here if you missed the last Battle of the Sexes btwn Empress & Dre

In the Male Corner w/ Andre

"Summer Time On The Courts Got Girls There!" - Will Smith

When it comes to summertime who doesn’t love it?? The Nice weather, the countless things to do, the vacations.....Summertime is the time to Be Free!!!!

With that being said, I don’t believe that men take off Summers when it comes to relationships. I believe that Women confuse the relationships that they are actually in. I know plenty of Men that are in relationships and when summer time comes, they are still in these relationships. I don’t believe that it is fair to say Men find ways to get rid of women and relationships when it gets nice so they can be single and "ready to mingle".

Women if the Guy is not your BOYFRIEND or HUSBAND - Read My Words - YOU ARE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH THAT PERSON!!

Women are emotional creatures, not all but most. It just seems like Women consider anytime they get close to a Man it’s a relationship. So when a Man is ready to cut it off and move because it was fun while it lasted, Women look at it as being cut off or being dumped.

Just like you feel there is always MAAADDD Men ready to mingle once summer time come, Women do the same thing as well. Women ya’ll have those "Winter Boos" too don’t front LOL!

I think Women need to better analyze the Situations they are in when it comes to Men, and once they do that will they find that Men aren’t taking summers off, but HE WAS NEVER WITH YOU!!

In the Female Corner w/ Empress

Ok – Lets start by re-asking my question: Do guys take summers off IN RELATIONSHIPS?  I understand that some females can catch feelings a lot quicker than guys… blah blah blah. But even so – how convenient would it be if the dude that she’s just fucking around with cuts her off as soon as the weather gets warm. Hmmm…

But let’s first clear up some things about the question at hand – RELATIONSHIPS.  Maybe I need to hang out with you and your boys, We Ready Ent more often because you paint a picture of all dudes in relationships being angels.  Are you just fronting or do you really know these men? Lol.  Secondly, when I say take summers off, it doesn’t always mean breaking up but maybe just pulling away a little bit during the warmer months to get some side summer buns.

Observing and being in relationships over the past 15 years, I have collected quite a lot of evidence to totally contradict your stance Dre.  I didn’t know it when it was happening but I got insight into this “time off” period when I was just a little Freshman in High School… and then again Sophomore year.  How would you explain being dumped on May 7^th one year and May 8^th the very NEXT year… BY THE SAME PERSON!!!!???  And guess when the reconciliation date was between the two breakups: September 26^th. Now beside me being a little crazy for remembering dates in 1994 - lol – was it me or did he just want some space during the summer? Cuz he came right back and did it again the next year.

And you quote Will Smith but the more interesting line in that song is “It’s like the summer’s a natural aphrodisiac.” As I got older, I saw how rocky May to September can be in relationships.  Every single one of my female friends had relationship issues this summer and each one of them had a story about a friend with issues. Guys are on the prowl so much harder in those 5 months. Is it because of the skimpy summer outfits? Is it because you can spot a jump-off much quicker when she doesn’t have on a full length snorkel? Maybe – but it’s definitely a proven fact. Because guess what, as sooooooooon as September is over – ya’ll dudes seem to take that ACTRIGHT pill and everything is fine.   And even those without girlfriends go searching for a winter cuddle buddy.  It’s absolutely ridiculous to me.  And like I said before, I have NEVER met a dude that disproved my theory  so I challenge you to introduce me to one.